Subscribe to San Francisco Magazine

Mod Lux Feeds

Now Playing

Pro Tips on How to Avoid the Naked Bike Ride

An annual naked protest is going down throughout San Francisco tomorrow. Here's how to avoid a lot of blurry booties.

 The blue lines are the planned routes for the World Naked Bike Ride on Saturday.

A group of bicyclists riding in united protest against the government is not an unusual sight in this town. But doing it in the buff, rain or shine, just weeks after a city-wide nudity ban was passed? That's, dare we say, ballsy. For the fourth year in a row, the World Naked Bike Ride will congregate in Justin Herman Plaza at 11 am tomorrow, taking off on three different routes through the city to protest our dependence on oil cartels and the harmful effect that gas guzzling can have on our environment. It's supposed to be a beautiful Saturday afternoon in the city, so if you don't follow this guide, you may find yourself with a blur of R-rated content wheeling by at some point.

Avoid the following five areas tomorrow:

1. Market St. and the Embarcadero

This is where the action starts, meaning you won't see actual naked biking, but the de-robing in itself. Big question is: Will the nudity police come in and shut the operation down before it even gets started?

2. The Marina

Let's just say that normally beautiful bridge view from the Green might not be so pleasant tomorrow.

3. Golden Gate Park

Frisbee players, beware. The riders are forging a middle-of-the-city path that cuts right through the Panhandle and Haight Ashbury, before winding all the way through the park. 

4. Ocean Beach

The event details explain that they will take a spin past Ocean Beach in the afternoon if it's nice enough. So save the beach BBQ bash for Sunday. Or just relocate to Baker Beach.. 

5. The Mission

There will be no shortage of man meat pedaling southbound through the Mission. Maybe skip your lunchtime burrito and instead, head east to the Dogpatch and Potrero Hill for a sandwich.

 

Have feedback? Email us at letterssf@sanfranmag.com
Follow us on Twitter
@sanfranmag
Follow Jeremy Dorn
@jamblinman