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Ten Reasons We Are Deeply, Deeply Concerned About the Cat Cafe

The tabby tea room is all wrong for San Francisco. Here's why. 

Pictured: An innocent feline-American opressed, objectified, and turned into a c

Pictured: An innocent feline-American opressed, objectified, and turned into a commodity. 

A cat cafe, called KitTea, is coming to San Francisco. You may have heard about this already. SFist quotes the founders as saying that "patrons will partake of all the enjoyment and therapy that cats provide, while enjoying healthy blends of exotic teas that are ecologically sourced from around the world. Our cats will enjoy a high-quality, elegant home constructed expressly for their pleasure. "

You may have thought this was a great idea. You were wrong. Here's why:

1. It encourages cat gentrification: What happens after all those privileged, entitled cats from the cat cafe push out all those longstanding neighborhood bookstore cats?

2. It's a veritable Burning Man of health code violations: You can't tell us it's safe to prepare food in a space that will be covered in more cat hair than Grey Gardens. (Update: KitTea informs us that "we aren't violating health violations. food prep and cat area will be 100% separate!") 

3. It'll force at-risk cats into renting their bodies: Young cats, especially from vulnerable populations, need to know that there are alternatives to the petting trade. Like cat college.

4. It promotes unhealthy cat body images: The cafe sends the message to young cats that the only thing that matters about them is the suppleness of their fur, not the strength of their minds.

5. Also cat ageism: Our society tells kittens that there's no life after six months.  

6. It uses non-union labor: Felines of the world unite. You have nothing to lose but your collars.

7. What about the rights of Rodent Americans? Celebrating cats is tantamount to silencing the voices of millions of American mice killed every year by these super-predators.

8. It discriminates against people with cat allergies: Seriously, we can't even go near a picture of cat without sneezing.

9. It sends a dangerous message about cat ownership: They are not your pets. They're your companions.

10. Uber is just going to undercut the cafe anyway: How long before Uber's kitten delivery system puts the cafe out of business? Don't we have enough class conflict in this city already?

 

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